Fact :

You don't have to say yes to all of the holiday things.

It is okay and completely healthy if you need to avoid the hustle and bustle of the holidays – whether that means adjusting the time of, or your attendance to parties, family gatherings, shopping, or any other outings.

A wise woman, who is a bereaved mother herself, once said at a Blue Water Hope meeting that when we lose our child, we also lose some of our sanity.

That can sometimes feel true in so many ways!

The point that she had been making was that we often think that we have to show up to events even though it would mean weeks of stress and anxiety leading up to them – because it is “the right thing to do.”

In reality, if we take the time to think about it, we would never want someone else who was struggling after the loss of their child to have to show up to an event of ours if they were suffering heartache and discomfort, just because they felt like it was the right thing to do.

We would want them to do what was best for them and their family because we love them.

So don’t forget that you are loved too and people will understand if you arrive late to an event, leave early, or plan to get together another time!

Give yourself permission right now to not attend any events that will cause you immense pressure or heartache.

By being gentle with yourself, you will find that the processes of grief and healing will come more naturally and in your own time frame.

It is okay to say yes if you want to ~ but also okay to say NO if you need to!